After spending the first five days of our trip with Michelle's extended families in Dongyang 东阳 and Luoyang 洛阳, it was time for her to meet mine. My Mum's side all live in Shilong (石龙), having been there for multiple generations. My father's side have moved nearby to Shenzhen (深圳), a bustling megacity on the border with Hong Kong.
While we had been jumping from place to place, my immediate family was finalising plans to meet together in Shenzhen. Mum would come from Shilong石龙, Dad would go to Guangzhou 广州 to pick up my older brother coming from Singapore, and Michelle and I would fly from Luoyang to Guangzhou before catching a train where we would meet my Mum halfway. Family reunions are difficult in the Feng household.
I call them my Diasporic Home, because they are the places which feel somewhat familiar to me, and the only places in China where I as a Chinese-Australian have any sense of belonging.
Thankfully there were no more seven hour train rides this time around. To get to Shenzhen 深圳 from Luoyang 洛阳, we took an early morning flight to Guangzhou 广州, otherwise known as Canton, before catching a train from Guangzhou East Station 广州东站 for an hour to Shenzhen.
Unlike trains in Australia where you can make a mad dash to board on the last minute, you have a 10 minute window to be in the railway terminal ready to board (including a customs check and X-ray scan) which closes 5-6 minutes before the train departs.
On our way from Guangzhou 广州 to Shenzhen 深圳 we arrive 30 seconds too late to board our train, which was especially stressful as my Mum was already waiting for us.
Alas we're an hour late for lunch with my Grandma, who had picked out a special Chinese vegetarian restaurant just for me.
After enduring a lot of teasing for being vegan by my Uncle, we made it back to our hotel room on the 36th floor in the heart of Shenzhen's skyscraper jungle and napped as the sun came down while waiting for my Dad and my brother to arrive from Guangzhou.
At dinner Grandma implore Michelle and I to join her in the morning to the 20th Annual Shenzhen Bougainvillea Festival (深圳勒杜鹃花展).
For as long as I can remember, Grandma 奶奶 has been obsessed with flowers and plants. The tropical, humid climate in Shenzhen 深圳 is ideal for it. I also think the bright colours of the flowers appeal to her zest for life, and provides a contrast to the era she grew up in, where most buildings were either concrete grey or red.
The festival is wildly popular, and we arrived at 8am to "beat" the overcrowded peak times (still busier than most festivals in Australia!).
The millions of flowers aren't really our thing but we have travelled across the world to spend quality time with her, so I appreciate the invite. We rest by the lake where children and parents would play with greedy fish wanting to be fed; it was too early to hire a pastel coloured boat.
We jump on a train to my parents' hometown of Shilong 石龙, which has now been swallowed up as a town within Dongguan 东莞 city. For locals, there is pride in being from Shilong 石龙; its location at the mouths of two rivers has meant it has always been an industrial trade hub through shipping, and it is known as the Home of Weightlifting in China because ten-time world record holder Chen Jingkai was born there.
The economic and manufacturing boom has not seen much change for Shilong, in fact it has seen surrounding districts and cities flourish, while it remains a semi-time capsule of China's regions.
It is somewhat fortuitous for me, as I continue to discover more about the conditions and life my parents grew up in for myself. As one of two Chinese-Australians in our entire extended family, being able to visit and see these places is the only opportunity to really understand what being a Chinese-diaspora is like.
It is the only place where you realise how different you are from everyone else in your family, because of where you grew up. And it is the only place where you can realise how that difference can enrich your understanding of yourself, your family and how you see the world.
As Michelle and I walk the streets the next morning, a group of workers roam the empty streets holding giant placards and yell into megaphones about a sale they have happening at a local jewellery store. Anything for a job I guess.
My Dad shows us around where he used to attend primary school, the houses where my Mum lived, the signs of the local department stores which specialised in whitegoods that my Grandma used to run. We bump into an old deskmate of my Dad's at school, and they share stories of life growing up here.
There are many historical streets named after industries within Shilong. My favourite street is called "卖鸡地" which translates to selling chicken land, because it was where farmers would trade chickens for other essential goods. Next door is a street dedicated to artisan, specialty bamboo makers who create all sorts of goods from dim sum steamers, brooms and many more.
We drop into an old local wonton noodle house which is quiet before the rush of midday lunch. It is the same place where I had wontons 20 years ago when I first came to Shilong, and the same as where my Mum and Dad ate 40 years ago. And now Michelle has tasted a bowl of the best wonton noodle soup you will ever have. Just thinking about it makes me want to eat wontons.
My best explanation of wontons are that it is a smaller, yummier version of a dumpling that works amazingly with noodle soup. If you have never had them, you're missing out.
Our final spot is Hongmian Lu 红棉路, which roughly translates to Cotton Tree Road, because of the 80 year old tree towering at the front. We pass by a streetfood cart making fresh batches of Changfen 肠粉, on our way to see my late Great Grandpa's house standing tall, with the entrance through a shopfront of a specialty laundry and dry-cleaner.
Unfortunately the family members living there aren't home, and the shop is closed so we can't have a look today. It's been through a whole bunch of renovations over the decades, it used to be a wooden house when Dad lived there.
It's time to dress up for the second major birthday and reason for visiting: my Grandpa on Mum's side 公公's birthday. It's a casual lunch for 80 people at his favourite traditional Cantonese restaurant, with all side of the extended family visiting.
While we help him get ready, he hands me a booklet of Confucian philosophy which he initially handwrote and then asked my cousin Leslie to transcribe a few years ago. I vow to attempt to read and understand it at some point, knowing that I will definitely think his views are outdated.
There's a lot of drinking, and a literal farm of a feast, with everybody taking turns to give gifts and a toast to Grandpa. Thankfully with my family, there's far less heavy Moutai 某台 being drunk, and more of a light sweet apple cider vinegar.
And then it's time for a champagne glass tower (Chinese style) and to sing happy birthday. Grandpa is happy, in his crisp white-grey shirt and his special service medals and badges of honour on.
It's our final night in Shilong 石龙, so our cousin Vivian takes Michelle, myself, my older Brother and his fiance to her favourite Changfen (Cheungfun in Cantonese) 肠粉 night stall, even after we've eaten too much food at family dinner.
Cheungfun are rice noodle rolls with fillings, typically prawn, barbecue pork or vegies, and a quintessential part of my childhood. It was my first time eating Cheungfun from a night stall, and I had been anticipating this for weeks ever since the idea was mentioned by Vivian.
And it didn't disappoint. It was the most delicious, freshest, melt-in-your-mouth, umami-bomb Cheungfun ever.
I hope we can I'll be able to spend a few more days in these places next time. I think I'm only starting to scratch the surface of my Diasporic Home.
This was part three of five from our trip last year before COVID-19. Subscribe here or down below if you haven't yet already to stay up to date on the rest of my travels and thoughts. Cabin-fever is starting to get to me! But I hope you are keeping well.
Love,
Thomas
© 2026 Thomas Feng
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