Highlights

An exercise of gratitude

By Thomas Feng

August 30^th, 2017

do i have friends?

You would be forgiven for questioning whether I have any friends or for thinking that I have not seen my friends in a very long time. I live alone in a one bedroom apartment, work full-time and volunteer 8-10 hours a week. Who has time for friends?

I haven't written about my friends as much as I'd hoped this year and to be honest, I simply haven't taken many photos of people. There is a lot to be understood about a person by the photographs they take (I will write a piece on this soon). In previous years, I took a mixture of photos of predominantly fun moments with people and landscapes or streetscapes which convey mood. I have focused a lot more on mood this year and it highlights how introspective 2017 has been for me.

Anyway, I do have time for friends. I try to make as much time as physically possible for friends, and I am really grateful to have such a supportive, creative, intelligent, thoughtful and genuine group of people around me. They are computer scientists, graphic designers, social workers, prodigal students, just to name a few. I am proud of all of you. Thank you for being such a patient and understanding bunch of humans.

Here are a selection of blurry photos which my cameras (predominantly the Canon MC) has focused on my friends' surroundings rather than my friends. They are captured moments from many times shared with friends this year which I have predominantly neglected from my blog.

Even while capturing some of life's most precious moments, my camera has prioritised the tree.

fulfilling moments this year

For all the lows I've battled, there have been many wonderful times this year (apologies if I've missed you - I have deliberately left off work/Road to Refuge activities):

Eating delicious vegan dumplings and attending Shimmerlands outdoor cinema hours before Marah left Australia
Summer picnics at the Moonlight Cinema with Liv
Cooking dinners, watching arthouse movies and dancing in my apartment with Jaynaya, Lucy, Imogen and Liv
Travelling to Jakarta for work and making a whole new group of work friends
Surprise visits to the theatre with El
Heide Makers' Market to see Pam's stall with Meg and Nathan
Ten-pin bowling and sweet potato chips with the Gemmas
Showing my brother and his partner all around Melbourne
Failing at making pom-poms with Baya
Singing 90's hits until the late hours of the night with Erin
Long chats in Carlton Gardens with Sam and Steve
Playing pick-up basketball at the local streetcourts with Nathan and Chris
Late-night Messina and Coles hang-outs with Gemma
Hiking the Youyangs with Cassie, John and Phil
Seeing a comedy fundraiser and late night pisco bar chats with Issy
Nathan's cafe-hopping birthday bonanza with Chris and Michael
Easter Sunday celebrations with Mary and Gemma
Seeing Eoin launch his documentary on Irish-Australian history at The Moat
Spending a whole afternoon eating vegan popcorn chicken with Em J
Gigs gigs gigs (especially Aurora, HAIM, Parcels, Laura Marling and The Middle Kids)
Hanging out at Hanging Rock with my parents
Yelling at the TV whilst playing Super Smash Brothers with Victoria and Elise
Walks in Sherbrooke Forest with Ai-Lin where we found a witch circle
Farewell Fonda Mexican dinners with Shruti, Jaynaya, Meg and Nathan
NLNL and chippays with Kineisha
Sunday morning best friend check-ins and chats with Nathan
Late-night vegan donuts with Em
Numerous Fitzroy Market visits with many friends
Getting ridiculously inebriated and experiencing an instant hangover thanks to Kaisha and Emma
11-hour Sydney to Melbourne train rides with Baya
Finding secret bars in Sydney and eating the best pizza of my life with Tina and Renee
Mulled wine and odd classical background music dinners with Lara, Imogen and Rose
Seeing Aaron scream at the TV whilst playing Mario Kart with Jinny and I
Vegan dinners at the family home cooked by my parents who have started to cook vegan things just for me
Late-night post-Hannah Gadsby show chats with Jaynaya
Post-basketball visits to Fel
Watching My Neighbour Totoro on a giant cinema screen with Gemma and Rob
Dinners and wines with Meg, Nathan, Chris and Steph
Dancing at Louisa's 60th with Jaynaya and Liv
Karaoke and more dancing post-60th at FAD Bar with Chris and Steph
Seeing Nathan and Meg become engaged
Will and Hannah's marriage ceremony + reception

It is a long list, and I have probably missed countless other moments but you get the point. Although most of these are "fun" moments, I think a better description would be heart-felt moments - particularly given the state I have been in - these are moments where we've been able to bring out in each other our most true and honest selves whether that is through words or through other mediums such as art, song and dance.

Writing out this list re-affirmed my own resilience to what has been a challenging year. It would be foolish to think otherwise and to base my mental health status on the list above, but equally I cannot only emphasise the sadness during my own reflections. Nevertheless, I want to say thank you to each and every one of you for your on-going love and support. Perhaps it's due to the end of winter, but I'm starting to feel more optimistic again.

to my family

It has been a tough year for us, but in many ways it is the first year that we're learning about each other as people - not simply as parents and children. We have shared more moments this year together as a family than for a very long time. Our collective resilience has brought us much closer together and this has been a particular highlight for me.